I can, I will, I must, Yes. I am myself

Keep on moving and put your trust in Allah.
Yes, undoubtedly I cried a lot. Almost everyday!
Subhanallah. I should get rid all these negativity from me. I must put trust in HIM and always think good things provided I have to keep on moving and working.
Ya Allah, please ease my journey.
;'(

Dengarlah wahai anakku

Anakku....
Ketika aku menjadi tua, aku harap kamu mengerti dan sabar dalam menghadapiku..

Ketika aku memecahkan piring, atau menumpahkan 

sup di meja karena aku mulai kehilangan pengelihatanku,
Aku harap kamu tidak berteriak padaku..
Orang yang tua sangat sensitif, selalu mempunyai perasaan kasihan pada diri sendiri ketika kamu berteriak...

Ketika pendengaranku menjadi semakin buruk dan tidak boleh mendengar apa yang kamu katakan, aku berharap kamu tidak memanggilku 'pekak'..

Tolong ulangi apa yang kamu katakan atau tulislah itu..

Maafkan aku, anakku..
Aku menjadi tua..
Ketika lututku semakin lemah..
Aku harap kamu memiliki kesabaran untuk membantuku berdiri..

Seperti yang aku lakukan ketika kamu anak-anak, saat belajar bagaimana cara berjalan..

 

Tetaplah sabar untukku wahai anak ku..

Ketika aku mengulangi kata-kataku seperti rakaman yang rosak, aku berharap kamu tetap mendengarkan aku..

Jangan jadikan aku lelucon atau merasa bosan untuk mendengarkanku..

Apakah kamu ingat saat kamu kecil dan kamu menginginkan sebuah balon?
Kamu merengek terus menerus sampai kamu mendapatkan apa yang kamu inginkan..

Maafkan juga tubuhku yang bau..
Aku yang bau seperti seorang yang tua tak pernah mandi 1 tahun..

Tolong jangan paksa aku untuk mandi Tubuhku sangat lemah..
Orang tua bisa sakit dengan mudahnya ketika mereka kedinginan.
Aku harap, aku tidak menjijikkan untukmu..

Apakah kamu ingat ketika kamu kecil?
Aku biasanya harus mengejarmu kesana kemari karena kamu tidak mau mandi..

Aku harap kamu bisa bersabar ketika aku mudah tersinggung..
Itu adalah bagian menjadi tua..
Kamu akan mengerti jika kamu menjadi tua..

Dan jika kamu punya waktu luang, aku harap kita bisa bercerita bersama.. 

 

Walaupun hanya untuk beberapa minit..

Aku selalu sendirian sepanjang waktu, dan tidak ada satupun yang bisa aku ajak bicara..
Aku tahu kamu sibuk dengan pekerjaanmu..
Walaupun kamu tidak tertarik pada cerita-ceritaku..
Tolong luangkan waktu untukku..

Apakah kamu ingat ketika kamu kecil?
Aku biasanya mendengarkan ceritamu tentang mainan kesayanganmu..

Ketika saatnya tiba, aku sakit dan hanya bisa terbaring..
Aku harap kamu bersabar saat merawatku..

MAAFKAN AKU.. jika aku tanpa sengaja mengompol dan membasahi tempat tidur.. 

 

Aku harap kamu bersabar untuk merawatku selama saat-saat terakhirku hidup hanya sebentar..
Bagaimanapun, tidak lama lagi aku akan pergi..

Ketika waktunya kematian datang..
Aku harap kamu menggengam tanganku dan memberiku kekuatan untuk menghadapi kematian..

Dan jangan khuatir.. 

 

Ketika akhirnya aku bertemu Sang Pencipta..
Aku akan berbisik di telinganya,, agar Ia menyertaimu..

Karena kamu mencintai ayah dan ibu..

Terima kasih nak atas perhatianmu..
Kami mencintaimu..
Dengan penuh cinta dan kasih sayang.

Credit:

Heard this from IKIM.fm

kids

something cute ;')

Down

Yakinlah setiap kesusahan dan kesukaran itu pasti ada kemudahan dan kesenangan. Jika Allah tidak anugerahkan ia sekarang, pasti di akhirat kelak.

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah. Jangan kau sulitkan.


T_T

You are half way done

Assalamualaikum

I am juggling now in between writing thesis and to complete another additional 10 tests. I was freaking out when my SV asked for me to re-run the program with another set of 10 random files. Huwargh! Yes. It is necessary for me to complete the test. Now, let us do maths:

(1) Training = 10 test files, where each file consists of 500 images. 

(2) Testing = 10 test files, where each file consists of 250 images.

These information only reflects the number of images used for the experiment. Somehow, I have 25 filters to be implemented on each of the images and the process continues. Yes, previously I need to convert all the images to grayscale format as the original images are in RGB. Deng!  These 2 process are considered as module 1 and module 2 respectively.

In module 3, feature extraction step taking its shape. A set of descriptors which later used in classification phase are generated. Well, truth saying I had difficult times in arranging those files. They are millions! Couldn't imagine them all. I just realised the exact size and numbers as I transferred the original project into my external hard disk for backup purpose. Fuh!

And then, the classification phase which is in module 4 goes. This would be the toughest phase as the main idea of this project is to examine the effectiveness of combining classifiers for classification. The selected 3 combination methods are stacking, naive and selected 5 best filters. Yes, the total number of files are million. 

T_T

Those rambling is to boost me up. I need to keep on motivate myself as I am half way done. Writing is never an easy task especially in academic writing. Subhanallah! I pray to Allah to ease me in both writing and programming task. Of course, I need to keep positive vibes around me. 

Yes. I can do it. 

Baity's wedding

So, this happened last weekend. I was all out to join the walkathon which I registered a month ago. But at last minute, I decided to attend friend's wedding in cameron highland. Well, she was one of my team mate in few multimedia projects during my undergrad years. She also shared the same supervisor with me as we are interested in same research area in completing our final year project.

Luckily my family are joining me as well or else I might end up attending the wedding alone. Of course I will not going there alone. Hehe Thank you love!

A pose outside the wedding hall. 

Writing wishes for the newly wed couple. 

So, here goes the newly wed couple. They look alike. Macam siblings. Many congrats to baity and her husband. Semoga bahagia sampai jannah hendaknya. Amin.

 So, this is me with my customary pose feeling like a tourist. I guess, this is a must pose with a tea plantation as your background. See the green and I am blended in the scene.

 We managed to visit the strawberry park and bharat tea plant. It was raining heavily the moment we arrived the strawberry park.

p/s Obviously my grammar is getting worse
*cry*

hey november

I just discovered that I haven't blog any entry for October and yet November has arriving. Hello November, and my heart starts to beats faster. Do you have any idea how to motivate and push myself? Pffftt...
Well, this quote really attracts me and I really hope I could make it a blast November. Insyallah.

"If you wish for a better today, then you have to be a better person from tomorrow"

Bismillah.. for a great start of November. I am all out now.

Masjid Besi, Putrajaya

These are some shots taken using my Samsung S Plus phone on last Ramadhan at Masjid Besi, Putrajaya. 

My darling, Belle

2013 marks as a remarkable year for me as I made a big decision to own a car. I realise that it is the right time for me to own an asset, at the age of 26 yo. Yes, apparently this asset reduces its value yearly but the fact that it helps me a lot to travel from a place to another place resulting me to settle with this car at this moment. 

Alhamdullilah. 

I introduce you to my darling Belle. She is a girl and her birth date is on 9th March 2013 by referring to the road tax certificate. The timeline begins  when I went to the showroom and started to signing all the purchase documents on 14th February 2013. There must be something special with 14th Feb as many  important things in my life happened on this date. 

I enrolled in UKM on 14th Feb 2012

 I started my first job in HSBC on 14th Feb 2011 

I guess it is true that woman is very sensitive with date and hence we remember almost important date for us personally. 

By the way, my darling Belle met with a small accident on June 2013. She was admitted almost 1 month in the workshop. Another remarkable thing for me thus making me write this entry. 

I promise to be extra careful and a lesson learnt. Hehe 

So, hello Belle!

You are annoying

Sorry for felling this way but you are really annoying me. You always interrupt in between the conversation which irritate me.

I still remember the moment I request a permission to have a copy of your chapter 2 and  chapter 3. That face reaction is still fresh in my mind. You don't even response to my request either. I know it might sounded wrong for me to ask your work but we are totally differ in research field. You are doing 'A' thing while I am doing 'Z' thing.

Obviously we are differ. You are doing art thingy while I'm doing science thingy. My intention is only to make sure that I follow the right template and format.

That is such annoying! That face reaction is still trigger me. Seriously I have turn out this way.

I learn an important thing.

My bucket list

Reading other's blogs do inspiring me and has made me to writing this "a list of things to do before I die". I believe any of us would have these kind of things to achieve in life, challenge to experience in, weird foods to taste and many more. Thus, here goes my list and of course this list will be updated by time as I may have many new wish to be written on here.

1) Earn my first salary (Feb 2012)
2) Fall in love
3) Do volunteering job (Zoo Negara 2012, Mangrove Plant 2012)
4) Get married
5) Drive on a road trip on each state in Malaysia
6) Vacation with friends in beautiful islands, Perhentian, Redang, Langkawi
7) Perform Hajj with husband
8) Graduate my master degree (Nov 2014 Alhamdullilah)
9) Walking on the busy street of New York City
10) Enroll in MIT. Ouch!
11) Visit Boston, MA USA
12) Visit Montreal, QC CANADA
13) Earn PhD
14) Give birth to my children
15) Give birth to twins, (a boy and a girl)
16) Climb Mount Kinabalu
17) Learn how to sew dress, blouse, malay traditional dress
18) Visit Turkey
19) Own my first car (March 2013)
20) Experience the live concert
21) Watch a theater (Oct 2012)
22) Speak in front of the crowd with confidence (Still learning it, didn't believe I made it)
23) Dance with the loved one under a romantic atmosphere
24) Watch a drive-in-movie
25) Picnic during summer
26) Read a book at a coffee shop in Paris street
27) Visit Eiffel Tower
28) Learn to play a music instrument
29) Road trip with the husband
30) Receive a promise ring (Nov 2014)
31) Grow old with someone I love, my husband
32) Go bungee jumping
33) Go camping, build a tent, campfire
34) Go on a romantic walk through a street full of snow
35) Write a love letter
36) Travel abroad
37) Study abroad
38) To ride a super bike
39) Learn 3rd language
40) Speak Arabic language fluently
41)
42)

;')


First publish is on 21st August 2013

Poor blog

I always wanted to update my blog regularly but most of the time I just left this blog dusty. Sometimes, I do blog hopping and there are several blogs which really inspired me. Most of them are just a simple person who share their madness, excitement, melancholic feels and other random topics which I found interesting. They come from variety backgrounds. Some of them are a student like me, a full time mother or housewife, a dedicated career person. Duhh.. I wish I could inspired people around me too.

At first, the purpose of having this blog is for me to write such feelings so that I could browse them back in future. I wish I still write any random post here but the fact that I am too lazy nowadays is the reason of the ignorance of this blog. How sad isn't it?

Definitely, I promise that I will update this blog regularly.
Nahhh!

The hardest part is myself.

Assalamulaikum!
Today is the 4th day of Ramadhan and I really feel good about it. So, how do you guys perform so far? Lets all of us work hard towards our personal achievement. Insyallah! So, This post is dedicated to myself. The lazy me. Huargh!

I have a bad attitude where I couldn't stay long when I'm doing any task. Well, I've lost my attention and passion towards what am I doing know. This is really stressful as clocks are continuously ticking and I could even feel that they are running faster than ever.

So, in this barakah month, I am really hoping I could step, jump, run forward and progressing my milestone. I really have to change my current attitude now. I just miss my days in uitm. I do not have any idea how determined and struggled am I years back there. I miss the environment, I miss my old room, I miss my friends, I miss my former supervisor. I miss all of you!

I have to move. Yes, I have!

Berusaha!

First experience at sepang circuit

College dinner

Officially we are almost done with out 3rd semester here and for me, my heart beats even faster. Feels like I just arrived Bangi yesterday. T_T

Basically I'm going to share some of the photos during the event. The theme of the dinner was "An Evening to Remember" which I found cute. Here goes all the pictures.

Till then! Bye

XOXO

Freaky june

Assalamualaikum
This blog has been neglected for quite some time and I do realize it but couldn't effort to post any updates here. I have tonne of stories to write here. I have thousands of them. I have millions of feelings to be described here and yet no words enough to be written here.

After all May and April were full with many activities. So do June where I started to freak out. I am far beyond my initial plan. Yes, I am freak out. Will post more backdated entries soon cause I miss blogging.

Bye!

Cousin's wed

Assalamualaikum!

I've been neglecting the blog for a quite some time due to many things. As expected, my post will reflecting my recent activity and again it is about wedding reception which I've attended. Last weekend, 28th Apr 2013, remarked as a beautiful day for both of the groom and bride as their's  reception day was held in Jalan Semarak KL. 

Selamat Pengantin Baru to my cousin, N A and her suami. There goes pictures during the event. Foods were delicious and of course the decoration around the hall were stunning. 

The dress is beautiful too!

I want to be a bride as well!

HAHA

 Mum and me

 Pasangan pengantin

 Everything on wedding receptions are just too nice and they totally capture my mind!

Us, with the pengantin

Farina's wed

Congratulation a friend since my diploma years, degree years and till now. Selamat pengantin baru. Apparently there is no bride and bridegroom photo. Hehe Some photo of me and friends on the day.

Anniversary dinner

So, we had our anniversary dinner last weekend. 

Everything happens with a reason

I was too lazy to get myself ready as my fingers were still working on the keyboard. I am totally agreed that process of selecting and filtering data is not easy. It might be among the toughest phase at all. Sigh. It took me quite some time to do several procedures in data pre-processing stage. Oh! I need extra in everything. Energy, time, delicious food! Ahem.

At the moment I glanced my watch, it was almost 2PM and yet I remember few things I need to do today. Since the last few days, I had survey where is the nearest center to refer as I've lost my phone. It was quite near to the uni but apparently I have never been to that area. That's the reason why I keep on delaying to visit the center.

So, I start with paying bills at the bank and proceed to searching the center. Obviously, I've lost my way although I keep on referring to the google maps while driving. Haha

I passed the same road about two or three times and I kept on making u-turn. Apparently, I should go straight instead of making u-turn at the same place. Haha Funny me. It costs me 30 minutes to discover several main landmarks in Kajang town. Now I can tell where is Balai Polis Kajang, Hospital Kajang, KPJ Kajang and even Stadium Kajang.

Yes, I've lost my track but the best part of it was I learnt a bit about Kajang town and surprisingly I saw a familiar car. Well, I tend to memorize plat number easily. So, u guys better be extra nice with me while driving. LOL

It was dad relatives's car and I am pretty sure about it. I even saw the big stroller at the passenger sit. Haha! Quickly I called my dad to informed it.

Alhamdullilah. Even I sesat pusing bandar kajang tu, I sampai juga ke destinasi. It was 4.45PM. Masyallah. Walaupun keluar lewat from uni, I sempat pay my bills. Walaupun sesat, rupanya I bertembung dengan kereta relative. Walaupun sesat, I sempat retrieve my old sim kad. Alhamdullilah. I am very happy!

Things may look small and tiny but once you think the significance of them, then you'll  realize how big they are.

;-)

Of healthy lifestyle

Beep beep... One text received

"Mamat handsome tinggi tu ada hari ni, mai la"

"Aku memang on the way. LOL "

Of girls activity part 2

As promised in the previous entry, this post is about the continuation of the post entitled "Of girls activity". Here are sequence of images illustrate what we did on the groceries we bought from the supermarket. We were thrilled and extremely enjoyed the weekend with delicious home-made cooking. Well, you know how delicious would describe your own cooking.

;-) 

Some of the groceries we bought. They are super cheap goods. I wish to live in own house and to cook for a family. So sudden, I want to be a full time housewife.

 They are fresh and cheap. Still couldn't believe we can get this groceries at this cheap price. I wish this is not a monthly offer but everyday offer. Hello, we people deserves to buy good groceries at affordable price. 

:-D

 Siakap goreng. 

Our delicious weekend lunch.

Of girls activity part 1

Assalamualaikum. 

Here, three of us enjoying the weekend with gloomy activity at room. At first we planned to go hiking at broga hill but due to rainy day on the day before, we decided to postponed our plan. It might be dangerous to hike (slippery etc).

We went to Alamanda instead of enjoying the nature at broga hill. 

Girls will always be a girl. Haha Lets check out what girls do in shopping mall besides window shopping in shoes/ clothes/ handbags outlet.

Here!

Fruits.

Fruits.

Fresh fishes made me thrilled and I wish to have a fridge in room right now so that I can buy as many fishes I could. I am talking as if I have 10 children at home. Kahkahkah

In full concentration to look for the best broccoli  Yes, all look same but there must exists the best among the good one. Hehe

In full concentration to compare prices. 

Ready to go back. Read the next entry to figure out the second part of this entry.

Hola!